Do-It-Yourself Femdom Ideas, Fantasies & Roleplay You Can Try Right Now

Lots of you loved my DIY BDSM ideas and so after much research and consideration, I have created a Femdom focused article filled with new femdom ideas, fantasies, and roleplays for you to try out. I think you’re going to love this one.

Just to be clear femdom is the art of female domination, something that has been quietly roaring through bedrooms across the globe. Society liked us to believe that it was men were who always were meant to take on the dominant role and women were submissive and although absolutely nothing wrong with that, times are changing and it’s time to talk about females being dominant in the bedroom and how freaking popular and sexy it is. Many men visit dominatrix services in order to get off in this way but I am here in the hopes of bringing this kink even more to the surface and letting everyone know that Femdom is here to stay and no matter if you’re a sub or a dom, switching is fun and these societal roles are made to be broken.

Consent And Understanding Femdom

Before we begin I wanted to give a quick PSA to everyone reading this. Femdom can be pretty extreme at times, much like BDSM it’s an art form that involves dominance, submission, punishment, and bondage amongst other things, and how far you go depends on your limits and things like punishments are to be agreed upon by both consenting parties beforehand.

Although sometimes the things you read below may seem extreme the adults participating in the Femdom world enjoy these things. Participants should both feel good, comfortable, and have already pre-discussed their limits and their safe words so if you haven’t already done this please have that discussion with your partner.

This is not about hurting your partner, it’s about playing into a kink you both have and having lots of fun doing so. Always play with someone you trust and know your limits before doing anything.

Now, let’s get into these seriously steamy ideas for you to try…

55+ Femdom Ideas

collection of femdom ideas

First up we are going to be looking at the things you can do in the bedroom that will help you to fulfill your femdom cravings. These all consist of different types of submission, domination, and even humiliation all related to the wonderful world of female dominance. Let’s begin!

1. Worship Every Part Of Me

For this one, you’re going to ask your little sub to worship every inch of you. You are in charge here and they must obey your worshipping commands!

Make them do things such as kiss your body, clean your body, suck on your erogenous zones, massage you, beg for you, and please you in every way possible. Here are some ways you can do just that:

2. Feet: Have them rub and massage your feet until you say stop.

3. Breasts: They must suck and rub your breasts, making you feel extra good.

4. Booty: Have them massage your ass, use a sex toy on your butt hole or even make them wash you.

5. Pussy: Have them clean up your pussy after an orgasm, sit on their face because you can’t find any chairs in the room, and make them beg for your magical pussy.

6. Clean Up After A Long Day At Work

Have your sub clean you up after a long day on your feet. Either make them lick your pussy clean, your feet, or even just have them bring you things so that you don’t have to lift a finger.

7. Learn To Shave My Pussy

Need to trim down there? Have your sub do it for you in the bath. After it’s all shaved and trimmed, make them apply lotion to your pussy too. Remind them that this is an act of service, not a sexual thing, they must be professional and listen to your demands at all times. Take things up a notch and make him shave himself too, smooth legs anyone?

8. What About My Nails?

Teach your sub to trim, cut, file, and paint your nails. Make them look cute and presentable and if they do a bad job? start again! You can also make him paint his own too, isn’t that cute?

9. Time For Your Milking

Using various sex toys to milk your partner, everything from a masturbator, a male vibrator, a sex machine, or a magic wand with this attachment, you just lube him up and it does all the work for you.

The idea is to tie up your man and have something that doesn’t stop jerking him till you’re satisfied. You can also throw in some punishments just incase he cums before you want him to.

10. Impact Play

Spanking is a great way to tease and put your man in his place. You can use floggers, whips, and paddles (this is my favorite paddle to use on my partner’s ass) to strike him anywhere on his body. It will put you in a power position and show him the dangers of misbehaving.

11. Orgasm Control (Edging For Hours)

Edging your sub is incredible, getting them to the point of orgasm and stopping is pure torture. Doing it, again and again, will drive them crazy and have them desperate to cum with just a stroke of your finger. Use orgasm control wisely, you will hold a lot of power.

12. Ruined Orgasm Play

Ruining their orgasm is one of the ultimate shows of dominance. Bring them to orgasm and just as they begin to cum, stop exactly what you are doing. Watch as they wriggle and moan, completely in shock that you would ruin such a great moment for them. This can be used as punishment or just a form of BDSM torture.

13. How Long Can You Last In The Hot Seat?

I have made an orgasm seat using a liberator sex pillow, this prostate massager, and my magic wand with the cock attachment, I pop my boyfriend on it and see how long he can last. You can also switch out the massager for a thrusting dildo or if he doesn’t enjoy anal play you can use a vibrator to vibrate on his gouche/balls while the other works on his cock.

14. 30 Seconds To Go (Set A Timer For Him To Cum)

Get a timer and set it for 30 seconds, he must cum within the time limit or face not being able to cum for an unknown amount of time (hours? days? weeks?).

However he can make himself cum is up to you, maybe he finally gets to have sex with you or maybe he can just jerk himself off as you watch him completely uninterested.

15. 30 Seconds To Last (The opposite of above)

Just like the above except reversed. This time you set a timer and he must last longer than the timer otherwise he gets punished. This works best if you have been edging him beforehand and you know he is already on the edge.

16. Small Penis Humiliation

Humiliation isn’t part of everybody’s femdom fetish (learn what you like the best) but it is for a lot of people and small penis humiliation, even if they are average or well hung is a lot of fun. It makes the sub feel out of control, humiliated, and in my experience, very horny. Here are some things you can do rather than just telling him quietly how small his tiny pee-pee is:

17. Take him to a nude beach: Whilst your there point out how much bigger every other man’s cock is compared to his.

18. Talk about it with your friends: Tell him how you have told your friends all about how small he is and how they laugh and joke about it with you too.

19. Show him what size you wish he was: Go online or point out men who have much bigger cocks than him, tell him how much you wish his cock looked like that and he will never live up to that.

20. Show/Tell him what you’d do to a guy with a bigger cock: Whisper in his ear and tell him how you would get off on a bigger cock and even show him using a large dildo, use it right in front of him and forbid him from touching himself.

21. I Need Bigger (So, wear this cock sleeve)

When you finally do get around to letting your submissive inside of you make them wear this cock sleeve because you couldn’t possibly let something so small inside of you, you need at least an extra few inches and the cock sleeve will provide that for you and take away sensitivity from their little cock. Read my full review on what this sleeve can really do to a cock.

22. Time To Lock You Up

Making your sub wear a cock cage (this is the one I use) as you tease them is incredible. Their poor cock will be straining and desperate for release but you hold the key and the permission to be let out and I don’t think that’s going to be any time soon. Is it? If you want some tips on using a cock cage click here.

23. You Know You’re Bi, Right?

It’s time to find out how bi your man really is. Have him only be able t jerk off to bi porn, try playing with a dildo, see if he enjoys sucking it, and finally roleplay being a guy in his ass. You can then level up to the real thing if that’s something you both want.

24. I’ve Always Wanted To Be Shared

You’re in control now, what’s something you’ve always wanted to try? Being with another man? Maybe being with a really hung guy? Maybe even being with a woman? It’s time to let yourself explore all while your hubby is locked up.

25. Feminization

Feminization falls into the humiliation category and a lot of femdom subs love it. Feminization is all about making him more female and making him feel as unmanly as possible. You can do these things to also help you:

26. Cum Play/Training: You can use ejaculating dildos, his own cum, and eventually another guy’s cum to train him into taking a load or two.

27. Dildo training: Have him work his way up in size using different sized dildos, have him read our guide on how to take a big dick in your ass, and have him follow all the instructions.

28. Crossdressing: Maybe it’s time to get him some tights, a thong, a cute dress, and some make-up. See how he responds, fuck him dressed like the cute girl he knows that he is.

29. Deep Throat Training: Using deep throat spray and the help of a nice big cock work on getting rid of his gag reflex by training his throat to take a nice fat cock.

30. Waxing: It’s time to help him shave/wax, hairless is in for whipped men. Make sure he is nice and smooth at all times, we don’t want any signs of ‘man’ on him.

31. It’s Time To Get You Some Special Clothes

Getting him a piece of clothing that shows others he is under femdom control. Something he can wear under his work clothes like a thong or something he can wear out in public for all to see such as a necklace or a shirt. Of course, just wearing something special during sexy time is enough, but some people like to take their fantasy outside too.

32. Try Your Own Cum

Make him taste his own precum, if he wants to make a mess he is going to have to clean it up. Place him in a position where if he cums all over himself he is going to have to get messy to get clean and if that isn’t an option you will clean it up with your fingers but of course, he is going to have to lick those clean as well.

33. What About A Facial?

He was always interested in giving you facials with his cum and now you are a femdom master it’s his turn. Make him give himself a facial, he will look so cute with his own cum dripping down his pretty face.

34. Condoms Only!

He is not allowed in you without a condom, he must be wrapped every single time and If he cums before you say, then let him know that you will empty the rubber right into his mouth. Sorry honey?

35. You Want To Creampie?

As a treat, that would be great but you do know you have to clean up my pussy after too? with your tongue?

If you are a couple who is into cuckolding, have your bull cum inside of your pussy and let your sub clean it out for you.

36. Flip A Coin

Each day I flip a coin, does he get to cum today? heads. Does he have to wait another day? Tails. Watching the anticipation on his face is wonderful and making him wait another day or even allowing him to cum but making him do it in the allotted time (as mentioned above) is a real treat to witness.

37. Dice Rolling

Roll a dice, give each number a specific meaning and each day let the dice decide his fate. For example, if you roll a 6 that means he is getting spanked, if you roll a 2 that means he is going to work in a thong. You get the idea.

38. Let Me Show You What A Cock Feels Like (Pegging)

Bend him over, lube up his ass and show him exactly how a real cock would fuck him by using a strap-on. Dominate his ass and his entire body, make him submit to your peg by playing with his prostate and giving him pleasure like never before, but always on your terms. If you have never done it before I have a guide on first-time pegging you should read.

39. Maybe We Should Try Stretching You Out

Focus on his ass, command his pleasure and stretch him out. Use your fingers and sex toys to get him used to the sensation before going bigger and bigger. You want to see his little ass all stretched out for you.

40. Sissy Training

This falls into the feminization femdom category. Turn your submissive partner into a sissy, dress him up like a female, treat his ass like a pussy, and command that he obeys your sissy rules whenever you play together. Going through sissy training can mean stretching his ass, locking his cock up, and treating him like a female submissive most of the time.

41. Reward Chart (Manner Training)

Manners are a real important trait to possess and that’s no different for your sub. Have him ask you politely when he has a question, to address you in a certain way (Miss, Lady, Mistress, etc), and never ever forget his please and thank yous. Each time he does this and learns to be a more well-mannered sub, he gets a reward.

42. Holding Back (No Pussy For You)

When he has done something wrong or right use your pussy as the reward and a cock cage as punishment. You can use this to work in pegging and other forms of pleasure or punishment (depending on both of your likes) for your partner while his cock is out of access.

43. You Would Look Cutter Plugged Up

Get him a cute jeweled plug or tail butt plug and have him wear it whenever and wherever you please, maybe while he is outside? maybe whilst he does the gardening? It doesn’t matter where you choose that he wears it so long as he keeps it in and if that means completely on show then so be it.

44. Don’t Forget Your Slutty Collar

It’s key that you get your pet a cute collar that matches his personality. Something pink and cute for such a good feminine sub? or something studded and bondage-inspired for a sub that likes to look a bit more hardcore.

I like my boyfriend to have a public collar that he can wear under his shirts, it’s plain, black and looks like a necklace and then we gets home I make him wear this gorgeous collar, it makes him look so cute and like such a good submissive.

45. What About A Fake Tattoo?

Try a slutty fake tattoo kit, brand your sub with whatever you like best. You can pick anything to tattoo on him, if you want humiliation pick a public place on his body to place it, maybe you’re feeling kind and will go with somewhere that’s just for your eyes only? Although only temporary it will remind him who is in charge.

46. Let Me Workout Your Prostate

Restrain him, have him lay on his stomach. You decide if his cock is locked up and then get to work playing with his prostate, explore it as you’ve always wanted to, use butt plugs, your fingers, vibrators, dildos, just take advantage of this beautiful moment. You may let him cum again and again or you may tease him until he is begging you for a release but whatever you do, ensure you give that prostate a good workout.

47. Dress The Part

Dressing the part of a femdom queen is important too, things like sexy lingerie, stockings and sultry eye makeup all make you look and feel the part. Wear what you feel most comfortable in but also have fun losing yourself in the part, wearing latex, bondage gear, and adorning yourself with sex toys. I have a full femdom outfit guide that you should definitely read if you are serious about becoming the femdom mistress of your wildest dreams.

48. Don’t Forget About Your Own Pleasure!

You come first, he needs to learn to eat pussy and ass and know how to make you cum, teach him and when he is occupied by you, use toys like this for when you’re pegging him:

Remember your orgasm always cums first, you must always cum before he does and if you’re done with sex once you’ve cum, whoops, sorry, guess he will just have to miss out this time! ?

49. How Should I Address You Miss?

Pick how you want him to address you in public and private, would you want a code name? a pet name? how about a dominatrix-inspired title? if you want to take things to a whole new level have him say it in front of friends and out in public just so they know his place and make him feel inferior.

50. Let’s Simulate A Threesome

Show him a good time by simulating a threesome by using sex toys. This is an in-depth guide on how it’s done properly but for now, here are a few techniques that I use on my boyfriend to aid us in simulating a convincing threeway:

51. Sex Doll: He fucks a sex doll, while you fuck him in the ass using a Peggy. Have him clean up the doll too using his tongue and then clean you up afterward.

52. Dildo: Have him suck a realistic dildo while you peg him. This is a really simple yet effective technique to make him submit and do something you command him to.

53. The magic seat: I mentioned my magic seat formula further on above in this article and all you have to do is have him sit on the seat, while you have him suck your strap-on or a random dildo. Because this seat houses sex toys you can also slide one inside of him as he sits there as you make him perform on your strap-on.

54. Sexy Selfie Time

Get your camera ready and take some sexy pictures of him and of yourself. Send these pictures to someone (a bull, a stranger online, etc), or keep them for yourself, safeguard them and bring them out whenever you want to see what a slut your partner is.

55. What About My Slutty Selfie

Now it’s time for him to take sexy pictures of you for you to send to someone else. Pose, masturbate, use sex toys and behave like a slut for the camera as he snaps away and takes pictures of you knowing they are going to be sent to someone else. He doesn’t mind though, he is just a silly submissive.

56. Permission Is The Key

Asking for your permission is not only well mannered as we discussed before but essential. He is never allowed to do anything without approval from his mistress. Here are some of the things that he must ask and do:

  • Always ask when he can cum.
  • Never cum without permission or face punishment.
  • Never moan unless I say so.
  • Make no noise unless I allow it.
  • Only change sex position if I grant it.

For my boyfriend and me if he really wants to cum without my permission he can, but he knows he will get punished whichever way I choose.

PSA: This is where safe words are extremely important!

Femdom Roleplay/Personas Ideas

showcasing the different femdom personalities

Having different roleplay and persona ideas keeps things fresh and exciting, you want to keep things different, incorporate new ideas, stick to what you like but remember to always have a trick up your sleeve as a femdom mistress. Here are some of my favorite roleplay and persona ideas that you can try:

Gentle Femdom

You do everything I have mentioned above, except you do it from the kindness of your heart, you take your time, you aren’t rough, you want him to cum, you just want to decide, when and how. You use soft language, you instruct him on what to do in a caring and direct way and his punishments are something you don’t want to give but you know you have to discipline him.

Bratty

Being a bratty femdom queen is a lot of fun. You will often find brats being associated with the sub, they will talk back, play up, not do as they are told, and generally misbehave but being a bratty dom is something that can be done too. You must also misbehave, cross lines, moan and complain, punish him ‘just because’ and do things just to get a reaction.

Switch

A switch femdom for us means that we both take turns being the submissive and dominant one and we sometimes play a game of doing exactly what you do to the other, so if you peg your husband, he gets to peg you the next time you switch. My boyfriend and I love this type of playing, it changes things up a lot and keeps everything fresh.

Worship Me

You just want him to worship your body in every way possible. Cleaned, kissed, massaged, spoiled, and treated like a princess. You want him on his knees, worshipping everything you do and every inch of attention that you give him. Think Egyptian empress with a peasant villager on his knees for you. Treat him mean and keep him keen as you roleplay this fabulous femdom persona.

Play Partner

This roleplay/persona is bubbly, fun, and enthusiastic. You just want to turn your hubby into a play partner you can have girly fun with. Play with his hair, make him cum, dress him up but still be in total control of everything that’s going on. If you say ‘bend over’ with a smile on your face, you mean it.

Teacher & Student

A classic roleplay but there’s a reason it’s stood the test of time. I like to take the teacher role whilst my boyfriend is my dumb, naive student. Lessons after dark always turn sexual and he does exactly as his dear teacher says otherwise he faces severe consequences.

Dominant

Rough is the only thing you know, you want restraints, impact play, complete submission, and an obedient partner in every way. There’s no being nice, there’s no sympathy it’s all kinky, and all-dominating.

Extreme

This is a step-up from the dominant roleplay mentioned before. This is extreme dominance, no forgiveness, complete bondage, and total control. You enjoy the pain aspect, punishing your sub and in the meantime, you want to be worshiped in every way as you enjoy inflicting pain on your sub, whether that’s on his balls, cock, ass, nipples, etc.

Femdom Punishment Ideas

list of different femdom punishments

If you’re stuck for motivation on what kind of things you can do to punish your submissive here are some of the punishments that I use on mine:

1. Temperature Play: Punishing your sub with temperature play is powerful. I like to use a dildo a put it in the freezer or into warm water before using it on him, it feels great but it also arouses a lot of discomforts.

2. Ruined Orgasm: Don’t let him know he’s not going to get to cum, build him up to the point of explosion, and just as he begins to cum stop everything you are doing, even better if he is restrained. This works particularly well if you are roleplaying the dominant or extreme persona that I mentioned above.

3. Extend Chastity Lock Up: I like to punish my sub by locking him inside of a cock cage, when it’s time to let him out I will tease him, get his cock all throbbing and ready for me and then decide to keep him locked up for a little while longer, pure torment.

4. Tasks: Have your sub perform acts of duty for you as a punishment, whenever you ask. Have them make any drink, make dinner, make the bed, clean the house, clean all of your sex toys, clean your pussy, go to the store whenever you need even the simplest thing, and even drive you around everywhere.

5. Boring Pointless Tasks: Arguably worse than acts of duty, this punishment requires your sub to wash, then dry up every dish and cup we own, after he is done, make him do it all again. Find any pointless task and just go nuts with it. Have him paint 1000 grains of rice, count the pasta shells in the jar, let your mind run wild with tedious duties.

6. Worship: Have him use a warm towel to clean your feet and then have him massage your feet, back, neck every day after work, turn him into a human leg rest whilst you watch a whole TV show, cuddle and caress whenever you ask.

7. Rubik’s cub: Get a Rubik’s cube, mix it up and punish him with no orgasms or sex until he has completed at least two sides.

8. Roll the dice: Once a day roll the dice, he can cum once you roll a 5. This could last for weeks or even just a day. It’s a gamble but incredibly fun for you but hard for him.

9. Porn: Put his favorite porn on, make him watch it, but don’t let him cum. Masturbate yourself if you want ultimate torture and don’t let him join in.

10. Humiliate: Take embarrassing pictures of him, make him wear a slutty collar in public, make fun of his cock size, and put down his performance even when he is putting the effort in.

11. Cuckold: Have him pleasure your bull, if he can get him to cum all is forgiven, if your bull doesn’t cum when your sub plays with him then the punishments will continue.

12. Ignore: You won’t talk to him for a certain amount of time. Ignore his pleas, his requests and act as if he is totally invisible.

13. Couch: Have him sleep on the couch until you think he should be allowed back into your marital bed.

14. Naked Past 6 pm: Have him be naked or get naked the second the clock hits a time, he must stay this way, even if that means exercising nude or answering the door.

15. Clothes: Have him wear female clothes for an hour (I like to choose my sluttiest tightest mini dress) or make him dress like that for an entire day if he has been really bad.

16. Clamps: Make him wear nipple clamps for 10 minutes, an hour, or a day, depending on how bad he has been, you can even make him wear them outside if you wish.

17. Ball Busting: This means to gain power by punishing him and destroying his confidence, similarly you can also ball-bust him as a punishment by crushing and inflicting pain onto his testicles.

18. Only Cold Showers: Only allow your sub to shower in cold water, watch over him to make sure he doesn’t break the rules.

19. Write On: Write in marker on his body what they did wrong, was he disobedient? slutty? bratty? whatever it was, make sure it’s clear and in plain sight.

20. Exercise: Especially if they don’t work out, find a workout on youtube, something hard, and have him complete the whole video whilst you watch.

21. Cum Play: Take his used condom and make him facial himself, even clean himself up after. For us, these are all things that would make me forgive him.

22. Begging: Make him beg and plead for forgiveness. There’s nothing sexier than a sub begging on their knees for your mercy.

23.Face Sitting: Sit on his face whilst you decide what to do with him next. Make sure your pussy gets right on over his mouth.

24. Have Him Decide: Have him decide what punishment he thinks he deserves. If you think that’s good enough, go for it, if not, find the punishment he was avoiding and go for that one.

If you want more punishment ideas you can check out this big list of BDSM punishment ideas that I created (will be released soon).


If you have anything you want to add or any advice that you need, leave a comment down below and I will get back to you!

Make sure to also check out my VIP membership where you will find hundreds of erotic stories, videos, and intimate user-submitted pictures.

Jess ❤️

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