Femdom Pegging Guide: Will You Obey My Peg?

Ah…welcome to the wonderful world of femdom pegging! a world scarcely unexplored by so many and undiscovered by even more. I love sharing new and exciting topics with you all and femdom pegging is something I want to touch on, so buckle your seatbelts because everything there is to know about this world is going to be found right here. Let me know what you think about this delightful kink down below, I love hearing from you all.

You may remember reading: my femdom story where a friend of mine spoke candidly about how she pegs her husband, it was a real thrill to read and lots of you wanted even more from her. I have already personally done a no-BS guide to pegging (I recommend reading it if you want to know the basics of pegging and warming up his ass) and since I published it a while ago now, I decided it was time to do a more in-depth pegging tutorial for all of you femdom queens.


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What Is Femdom Pegging?

what is femdom pegging

So, what is femdom pegging? The big difference between normal pegging and femdom pegging is the domination side of things. It all comes down to female dominance (Femdom), this person then identifies as the ‘top’, they take charge in the bedroom, and often we may hear them called ‘Dominatrix’ or ‘Mistress’. Often this act comes with associations to BDSM and their domination can take charge physically or mentally (submissiveness) but when it comes to femdom pegging it’s clear who is the boss and who must submit and that person is the ‘bottom’.

It doesn’t have to be forceful (but can be), it can be soft and be as simple and making your partner submit and take light orders, you tell him when to cum, to be quiet and you decide his journey to orgasm (or maybe he doesn’t deserve an orgasm). It can also be more extreme, with hard spanking, restraints, multiple partners and you can spank, restrain, gag, and be rough. For me, it’s all about surrender and a power shift in my relationship. I can now control his butt.

There’s a whole reddit set up for couples showing off their femdom relationships, if you want to see it in action.

My Femdom Pegging Tutorial

cartoon women holding signs and coving up their bodies

I want to show you exactly how you can explore, discover and even perfect your femdom techniques. It may seem like a daunting task at first, there seems to be so much to consider but in reality, it’s really straightforward you just have to really believe in your character, whether that’s the sub or the dom, be careful, and have lots of anal fun.

What you will need for this guide:

You’re going to need a few things, they are easy to get ahold of and will make your fantasy become a reality. I only ever choose high-quality products and things I have tested myself and that I know are good and so the first thing I wanted to show you was this:

Strap On Kit: It comes with everything you need including a harness, a 7-inch dildo which is ideal for beginners and it is unisex so if you do want to switch things around from time to time, you can. I also find it to be non-intimidating which is really essential for newbies in my eyes.

Another great thing about this kit is that it does come with three interchangeable O-rings which means you can swap out the dildo that’s included to one that’s bigger or smaller whenever you want to, which is something a lot of dom’s do when they want to punish or praise their sub.

Pick the right size dildo for you:

Small peg dildo: This can be used to ease your partner into anal play if they are new to it. It can also be used as a punishment if your sub really wanted something larger.

Medium peg dildo: A great place to start and is included in your kit above. This is ideal for all sorts of play and feels amazing inside of you.

Large peg dildo: For punishment or for praise, this large dildo is not for the faint-hearted but depending on the time of femdom mistress that you are, you may want this bad boy inside of your arsenal.

Ejaculating peg dildo (if you like cum play): Some like to fool around with cum, shooting it deep inside of their partner or even on them. It can be a reward or a punishment, that’s up to you and your rules.

There a few extras that make your process even more fun that I thought I would include:

My favorite lube: This stuff is safe to use with sex toys, makes your ass slippery, and makes insertion a whole lot easier.

Cum lube: This lube feels like cum, looks like cum, and can be used inside of the ejaculating dildo I mentioned above or just sparingly over or inside of the body whenever it is desired.

Remote control love egg (for my pleasure): I like to insert this inside of me before putting on my harness, it brings me extreme internal pleasure and makes pegging an even more enjoyable experience.

Cock cage: For the more extreme femdoms among us, a cock cage is quite often used. This is to restrain the cock as you peg their ass or just as a punishment to tease them with during foreplay.

Handcuffs: This set comes with a blindfold too and the reason I included it is because a lot of subs like to be restrained during foreplay or sex and taking away their vision and the ability to move their hands is a huge submission tactic.

I Start With Myself

This is what my boyfriend and I do. Everyone may do something differently but from the people I know, I know that making yourself as cute and as sexy as possible before sex is a turn-on not just for your partner but for yourself too.

I like to wear some of my favorite sexy lingerie with a cute summer dress, with my strap on under it. I like to make sure it’s in place before fooling around with my boyfriend and this is where I will insert my love egg or play with my first love, my wand vibrator.

Feeling horny, turned-on, and warmed up is key for me to be the best femdom I can possibly be and my boyfriend loves it too.

Start With Sizing Him Up

With anal sex, it’s important to go slow and listen to your body. However, the more used to anal play that you get, the easier it is to transition into the backdoor and enjoy all of the pleasure it has to offer.

When you begin your femdom pegging journey you’re going to go through three different stages. These three stages will often occur each time you get your harness out, they aren’t just reserved for amateurs and professionals.

Just Starting: During this stage, you’re going to want to tease his ass, use smaller dildos, stretch him out and lube him up. This can be done with ass licking, using your fingers to penetrate him, or with a small dildo inside of your harness. It’s really important not to skip this step.

Warmed up: Once his ass is all warmed up you can use a large dildo in your harness or even just speed up with your rhythm. You can also introduce other sex toys at this point too.

Busting His Back Out: Once he’s ready you can begin busting his back out, penetrating your partner however you wish, spanking him, caressing him, or just treating him like the sub he is.

Pick A Level Of Femdoming

Depending on where you are on your journey can change what type of level you are at. Some days call for a soft submission and other days call for an extreme pounding. Listen to your partner and learn what works best for you both.

Soft: Whisper your commands, tell him he’s a good boy and what you’re going to do to him, be romantic, sensual and let him know how much you want him to cum. You will still be dominating his ass but your nature is softer and you want him to feel good.

Neutral: Mix every level together but tone everything down, this will include a little restraint, a little whispering, some commands, some spanking, just nothing too extreme or too soft.

Hard: Use restraints, serious commands that if disobeyed lead to ruined orgasm, thick and long dildo, face sitting, gagged, submission, he listens to your every word, does as you say and is there for your pleasure and your pleasure only, if he gets pleasure it’s because you want to give it. Let out your intense dominant side at this level.

Extreme: Use a cock cage, explore chastity, complete body restraint (usually ankle restraints mixed with cuffs), spanking, hard, deep, rough thrusts, lots of latex in your outfit, no penile orgasm, only prostate orgasm, fake cum play, vibrator on the cock cage with orders that he can’t cum until timer is done.

Feminizing: This level isn’t for everyone but I thought I would include it for those of you who are interested. This requires you to feminize your partner, dress him up, call him female associated names, show him what it’s like to take a cock, treat him like a cute woman, call his ass his pussy and degrade him however you wish.

Simple Rules Shouldn’t Be Hard To Follow:

These are some of the rules you can use during your femdom pegging evening. Think of your own too and make sure you are both on the same page when it comes to rules and limits.

Pick a few of the below each time you play and depending on the level of intensity you choose, you can swap and change with the rules you like. For example, during a soft play, you may not want a punishment rule but during extreme play, you are going to need lots of them.

My femdom rules:

  • Don’t make a sound.
  • Don’t move a muscle.
  • Stay in [insert position] until I say.
  • Cum within ten seconds of my command.
  • If you cum before I say I’ll ruin it.
  • Stop sucking that dildo I gave you and I’ll stop.
  • Beg for my dildo.
Any time a rule is broken you have a choice:
  • Cooldown and stop penetrating.
  • Spank.
  • Increase dominance.
  • Take a second away from the time widow he is allowed to cum in.
  • Degrade.
  • Penetrate harder.
  • Chastity.

Femdom Pegging Ideas

a list of different pegging ideas

It can be hard to sometimes come up with new ideas, using a harness and pegging your partner’s ass is a lot of fun but from time to time you may want to mix things up a bit and I have included some of my favorite pastimes for when we are pegging and feel like doing something a little spicier. Below I have left you with my boyfriend’s favorites:

Milking Time, mixed with threesome training

Use a pocket pussy while pegging his ass it’ll make him drool or you can even have him sucking on a dildo while you peg him if that’s both your thing. You can even have a fake foursome by pegging his ass, having him use the masturbator, and making him suck on a dildo too.

It’s a lot going on but it vamps up the pleasure, milks his cock and his prostate and it’s a whole lot of fun. I did a whole post of our threesome pegging if you want to know more.

Vibrator massage

Whilst you’re pegging him you can massage his shaft, balls, and gouch (the area between the balls and asshole) with a vibrator, even just hold it in place yourself while you thrust into him. It makes my boyfriend cum so hard and it’s super erotic.

Timer Test

I like to set a 10-minute timer and if he cums before the timer is up he gets punished. You can do this with all sorts of time limits, tell him he has 5 minutes to cum or that he isn’t allowed to cum until the timer is up. Be creative and do what you know will be a challenge to him, for my boyfriend, it’s having a time limit on not being able to cum, it ends up trembling and shaking desperate not to cum until I say so.

Reward Daily Chart

Daily rewards equal his ‘level’ (soft, neutral, extreme, etc) in the bedroom. We have something similar to a sticker chart except we just jot it down in a notepad. If my boyfriend is good and obedient I go easy on him in the bedroom and he will probably be allowed to cum, if he is disobedient then it changes everything and I’ll be assertive, dominant, and show no sympathy when he is begging me for an orgasm.

Cum experience

You can use the ejaculating dildo I mentioned further up in this article to show your partner what cum really feels like. Use it to degrade them, make them jealous (my dildo has cum and you haven’t), creampie them, or just as a new twist.

Learn and use your imagination to use the fake cum in different ways such as a facial, an ass filling, a cum shot over his back, etc. It’s something different and it really brings the dildo and whole submissive/dominant to life.

There’s a whole list of amazing femdom ideas here, it’s amazing for coming up with new ways to have fun with this kink.

Got More Tips? Let Me Know In The Comments!

I love hearing from you all and if you have any femdom pegging tips leave them down below for everyone to share. If you need any help also feel free to ask me below and I will get back to you instantly!

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